Lifestyle

The Secret of Happiness

I have been married for almost a year now and I’ve got to say there have been some challenges but a lot of amazing experiences my Husband and I have shared together.

 

On the 4th September 2016, I lost my baby to a miscarriage. I know the title of this blog post is ‘The Secret of Happiness’, so I promise I won’t make you cry. So it’s been just over 4 months since I lost my baby and I have to tell you it has been a struggle to go through. At the time I didn’t realise how common this was in pregnant women, I think it’s something like 1 in 4 pregnancies end up in a miscarriage. Before I knew this I started to blame myself for what happened. I kept saying, ‘was it something I did wrong?’, ‘why is this happening to me?’ I’ve come to realise that our Heavenly Father has a plan for each and every one of us, and if things like this happen, they happen for a reason. People ask me whether I will try again, I say yes eventually, but I’m not sure when. When they ask me that it does put pressure on me, but I know I will get pregnant again and I will have a baby, I just have to be patient.

 

I wanted to remember the baby, so I have made a note of things, I don’t want to forget. That baby will always have a place in my heart. I am going to keep my pregnancy notes and my documents I have from this pregnancy and keep them in a safe place. I don’t want to just forget it ever happened, I never will, and I’m okay with that. My husband and I, we lost our child and that’s something worth remembering. I also bought a necklace to remember my baby by;

 

“Though we never saw you,photo2.jpg

Never kissed you,

Never held you,

We will always love you.”

 

 

 

 

I found this poem and it really helped me with the pain and sadness of my loss;

“I carried you every second of your life, and I will LOVE you for every second of mine”.

 

I am a mother and I will always be a Mother, even if I don’t end up having children. I believe you become a mother as soon as you find out you are expecting, not just when you give birth to a child.

 

I love my baby and I always will. As I said, my baby will always have a place in my heart.

 

I have learnt from this experience, to be grateful for what I have, a home, food, a husband to take care of me and be with me at times like this, a family outside of my home and support of friends and loved ones. I could list many more blessings I have in my life and every time I list them, it makes me feel a whole lot better. Count your blessings, for this I believe to be the secret of happiness!

 

Count your blessings, name them one by one. Count your many blessings see what God has done.”

LDS Hymns – ‘Count your Blessings’

9 thoughts on “The Secret of Happiness

  1. Emily this is beautiful
    You will have a child one day soon
    As you say miscarriage is very common and most probably happens for a reason unknown to us
    I wish you every happiness you and Matthew will make super parents when your little one comes along
    Love Caroline , Martin , Ava and Lucia xxxx

  2. Sorry to hear your sad news you are both in my thoughts and prayers,when the time comes you will both be super parents God bless love Joanne (sister hall)

  3. You love one another and loved your baby. You won’t forget it ever and it will make your other children even more precious . YOu are so brave to talk about it and I wish I had had the courage you have when it happened to me. God bless you and Matthew.

  4. Reading your post really touched me. I can’t express how I felt when I realized you were sharing your own experience with a miscarriage. I love that you titled this “The Secret of Happiness”, even though it is a sad story of loss. I can really see your eternal perspective of the family. I’m so happy to know that you will see your baby again, and that you can still see the sunshine in the darkness.

Comments are closed.